Comments through October 17, 2003
(Spoilers:  I read ‘em, but I only spoke one of ‘em)  

Can you see the bubbles beginning to rise to the top of the pan?  The water should be about to boil.  I’m enjoying my GH right now as the set ups continue for November sweeps.   

In a breathy voice, Emily told Nik in the GH elevator maybe an hour after Zander dumped her I’m-so-honest-and-I-love-stringing-you-along butt, “I don’t want to cut corners or step into our marriage like a couple of thieves.  When I marry you, I want it to be for all the right reasons.”  When I marry you?  When?  Oh my young, insensitive nymphet let me count the ways of your shallowness.   

1.  Any normal person would allow at least a few hours mourning the death of a marriage before assuming the other guy wants to marry her.

2.  You used your cancer as a reason for bad behavior, claiming honesty but really basking in the persistent attraction of two extremely hot guys.

3.  You were offered opportunities to end gracefully, caringly the relationship with Zander yet you chose not to.

4.  While married, you could have just said no when desires stirred within you for Nikolas.  You could have used a concept that the rest of the world practices called self-control.

Emily and Nik struggle for self control as they

realize that they can’t have sex in the elevator

because of the security cameras. 

I was prepared to walk through emotional fire with Emily as she dealt with breast cancer.  However, the cancer has been reduced to light background music to the Zander/Emily/Nikolas triangle.  Do the writers realize how badly they’ve presented Emily, a character that generally resides in the goodness and light category?  Maybe that’s why her behavior now is so difficult to swallow.  I expected better from her.  She told Cameron, “It was Zander’s decision Dr. Lewis and I have to respect it.”  Yeah, but you don’t have to throw a passion party in the elevator ten minutes after breaking Zander’s heart.

“See, Dr. Lewis?  This is my I’m-so-honest face.

I practiced for hours in front of a mirror until it’s perfect.” 

“Hi Zander.  Look, this is my new I’m so honest face.

What do you mean it looks like my other honest face?” 

Technically, Nikolas is as guilty as Emily when it comes to cheating on his spouse, though he never proclaimed love to Lydia.  I felt bad for Lydia when Nikolas turned down her offer of assistance in planning Stefan’s burial service, but then he lovingly kissed and hugged Emily right in front of her.  Tacky, Niko.

The scene was about Niko kissing Em

but I wanted to know if Lydia was wearing white boots.

She reminded me of footage I saw decades ago when

Nancy Sinatra sang “These Boots Are Made for Walkin’” 

I didn’t want Stefan dead, but at least he showed us a really good die.  Gasp, accuse Luke, gasp, call Nik’s name, gasp, shudder, die.  Good one.  Did anyone else expect Stefan to turn skeletal, shrivel up and blow away as dust like bodies do in horror flicks?  I’m not sold on Stefan’s death, spoilers notwithstanding.  The best part of Stefan’s death was Luke’s unabashed delight as he disrespectfully sat on deadSteffy’s coffin though I thought beating him up with the shovel a bit over the top.  As soon as I saw the guy dragging the shovel at deadSteffy’s memorial service, I knew it was Luke.  Anyone have any doubts?

I predict that Luke will visit Stefan’s grave to talk over life like

Sonny airs his woes to Lily’s headstone. 

Don’t you love a woman who can spread degradation and cruelty with rapier charm?  Whoever writes dialogue for Helena and Luke deserves an extra helping ice cream with whipped cream.  Constance Towers and Anthony Geary deliver their lines smoothly, cruelly, somehow making me love hating them or hate loving them.  As soon as Helena walked into the memorial service I was anticipating the face off between Luke and her and I wasn’t disappointed.  I loved Luke’s bow as he left the cemetery and savored Helena’s secretive smile.  Oh yes, there could be tons more to the story if the writers choose so pursue it.

Skye spoke my favorite line this week.  Luke said, referring to Skye as a hostage, “You could come in handy.”  To which Skye responded by informing him, “Yeah, well forget it.  I’m nobody’s hostage.”  Good for you, Skye!  Why haven’t Luke and Skye connected before?  I can’t wait for more scenes with these two.  I can’t see Skye tolerating Luke’s shenanigans without thinking up a few of her own.

“Look doll, women all over the world have told me the braids are sexy.”

“Did they say that before or after you paid them?” 

Why isn’t Lucky wearing a uniform and working shifts like a regular rookie?  I still say it’s a scary thought that Lucky’s been issued a gun.  Lucky informed Scotty that he was off duty because he had to attend deadSteffy’s funeral.  Why then, did he show up in uniform at the service? 

Lucky wears his uniform off duty and jeans on duty.

I’m so confused. 

Let’s just throw in the towel and disband the Port Charles Police Department.  They can’t solve a crime.  And if they do happen to cuff someone, they can’t even get him to the police station and keep him there while they process paperwork.  After Stefan swan dived off the cliff, no wonder Luke laughed as he was lead away in cuffs.  He knew when he said he wasn’t going to prison for killing Stefan, he really wasn’t.

“Jason, you may kiss your bride.”  Sigh.  OK. 

Way to mess up a honeymoon Lorenzo!  No pecs, no intense love scenes before you trashed the honeymoon ambience with your plane sabotage stunt.  Topping off the destruction of romance was Sonny waiting as Jason carried Courtney over the threshold.  I feel cheated!  I would even have put up with the requisite 77 candles for a good love scene.  Oh well, maybe we’ll be offered one during sweeps.  A girl can hope.

There’s romance, and then there’s Sonny.  On the phone.  In the way.

So much for romance.

“Jason, I need you to go to work.  Since I can’t be with Carly, I figure

you won’t want to be with Courtney either.” 

Courtney nailed GH’s philosophy when she told Jason, “We just got married and everything’s already about Sonny and Carly.  I love them.  I do.  But it’s like we automatically give them a free pass and they get to say and do whatever they want, even if it means compromising our time together.”  Nothing like hitting the nail on the head and realizing right off the bat that Jason and Courtney’s marriage is about providing background for Sonny and Carly’s dramas.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy Sonny and Carly.  But I wish, like so many other fans, for a better balance of stories.  On the other hand, really, what’s Courtney complaining about?  It’s not like she has a life of her own, a job, ambition, a hobby, a like or dislike other than the occasional round of kickboxing, a reason for being other than babysitting and kissing Jason.  Well, kissing Jason might be a reason for being.  We all know that Jason’s life revolves around Sonny and The Business.  It’s pretty much a lock, Sonny and Carly get a free pass to encroach upon Jason and Courtney’s newlywed needs.

“Carly, get a clue.  We want to have sex.”

“Feel free Jason.  I’ll just wait down here in your living room

munching on chips.” 

The ping barely sounded above a whisper but it clinked into Sonny’s consciousness.  Ping.  Marcella made a fatal mistake when she said she remembered how happy she was when Sonny told her he loved her.  Ping.  Sonny never told Lily he loved her.  Ping.  Maybe Lily’s ghost really isn’t Lily’s ghost.  Ping.  Maybe someone’s messing with his mind.  Ping.  So, does Sonny run home and inform Carly that he’s found his sanity again?  Does he phone Jason and tell him to put The Plan into motion?  No, of course not.  We’re talkin’ about Sonny here.  Self absorbed, don’t have to explain nothin’ to nobody Sonny.  In my imagination I dream of Sonny informing Jason that he knows Lily’s ghost is a fake and Jason saying, “Duh, Sonny, I told you so.”  Cause Jason’s been right about 863 times in the past and no one listens to him.  It’s an immature thought, I know, but sometimes immaturity can be satisfying.

PING!!!!! 

Marcella made points for showing up at the penthouse and knocking on the door.  Poor girl doesn’t have a clue what she’d be in for if Carly had spotted her. 

Don’t do it Marcella.  Don’t knock.  You’re pretty but you’re no match for Carly. 

Go Carly!  She was stellar the whole week.  Even though I knew Sonny and Carly weren’t going to die in the plane crash, tears welled as they spoke with Courtney and Jason and then Michael.  I loved when she fought with Sonny and didn’t back down because he’s a strong character and it takes a tough cookie to not only put up with him but go toe to toe.  On Friday, I appreciated her humor with Jason and Courtney as they tried to nicely usher her out of their penthouse and later, her willingness to let Sonny go.  I’d say the playing field is about equal when it comes to Sonny and Carly alternately pushing each other away and pulling together.  The beauty in this couple lies in their dysfunction.  They can stay married and make it play because the drama appears through their problems and insecurities and the marriage is their anchor.

Physical death, emotional death – Sonny and Carly play it all. 

A giant HUH rolled through me when Sonny and Carly survived the plane crash and then Sonny left his exceedingly pregnant, just-been-traumatized-by-a-plane-wreck wife alone on the tarmac to make her own way home while he drove off in the limo.  HUH?  Oh well, Lorenzo showed up, maybe Carly hitched a ride home with him.

Let’s see….Sonny takes off with the limo,

so a girl’s gotta do what’s necessary to find a ride home. 

It’s been driving me crazy that for all Sonny’s supposed fear for his family, bodyguards are rarely spotted guarding the penthouse door.  However, after this week I know it’s because they are off doing other things, like riffling through boxes of Lily’s personal effects.  Even knowing it was coming, I experienced a surprisingly strong feeling of disappointment when Johnny betrayed Sonny to Alcazar.  Bye-bye Johnny.  I wish Scott Egan well.

Hopefully, he’ll soon reappear on another soap with a

more significant role. 

Spoiler Quote from this week’s Soap Opera Digest by Executive Producer Jill Farren Phelps:  “Sonny and Carly’s storyline will have major repercussions for Jason and Courtney and their relationship.  They will have to face a challenge that they are not prepared for.  And a mysterious new man will come into Courtney’s life.”  A new character?  “Sort of.”

I have no clue who the mysterious new man could be but I have to say I immediately thought of Zander.  Since Zander’s supposed to hitch his wagon to Liz for at least one more night of passion, his next stop should be Courtney if the writers continue with the trend that Courtney gets all Liz’s guys.  Then I thought, what kind of crazy woman would walk away from Jason?  I tell ya, I just can’t fathom the thought!  Yeah, I know, it’s my own private personal little bias, which I try hard to keep hold of when I write this column. 

My GH Positives For This Week 

1.   Skye and Luke my new favorite verbal sparring partners.

2.  Alexis looking fine in leather pants and matching leather jacket.

3.  Luke and Helena trading taunts and threats.

4.  Nikolas crying over Stefan as he sat by his dead body at the cliffs.  My heart broke with his and he’s definitely the best guy crier I ever saw.

Doncha want to hand him a tissue and wrap your arms around him? 

5.  Sam has the prettiest, whitest teeth.

6.  Jason effortlessly swept up Courtney and carried her to the bed.  I love that he can do that.

7.  Skye declared her independence and moved back into the cottage.

8.  After Michael came to Carly’s defense, Carly and Sonny sat on the couch with Michael and explained that they were not handling their anger well and they needed to find a better way to address their problems.

9.  Alexis didn’t blow off Stefan’s death.  She mourned the brother she loved.

10.  Helena.  Helena.  Helena 

It was an off week for me.  Weaning myself off caffeine was harder than I anticipated and I only succeeded four days out of three.  One step forward, three quarters of a step back.  My moods swung from fine and dandy to mind bendingly annoyed.  Since I don’t do annoyed on a regular basis, I didn’t like myself much on that day.  Why am I putting myself through this?  Oh yeah, health and long life.  So let’s all cheer, pat ourselves on the back while we do a few sit ups and push ups.  Gee, I’m feeling healthier by the moment.  How ‘bout you?  (Feel free to roll your eyes here.)  Thanks for the supportive e-mails, it’s nice to know I am not alone in my Diet Coke frenzy.  I am humbled and filled with warm fuzzies each week from your responses as I ramble about GH and life in general.  Think of yourselves as therapy.  Thanks for reading.  

http://www.internetbumperstickers.com

Where would I be without screen caps?  Thanks, Terry.

http://groups.msn.com/GHWorld3/shoebox.msnw

Got chi.

Got rhythm.

Got a cool dress.

Got an urge to dance. 

Kathy's Archives