Comments through November 7, 2003
(A spoiler for me, a spoiler for you and we’ll meet for tea at three.) 

I haven’t finished the accounting yet, but if I don’t write my head may explode which will certainly upset everyone in the house not to mention the mess.  It’s funny that as soon as I decided to take a break from writing the column to complete tasks that have been building up around me, my life became packed with events conspiring to keep me from my numbers chores and my column.  Pfft! to that idea, so write I must because some fun stuff showed up on my screen this week.   

Wasn’t that a fine snit Courtney displayed before lunch on Monday and Tuesday?  Jason wouldn’t choose to leave the life that she swore she could handle so she’s packing up her toys…err, I mean Carly’s kids…and leaving.  I remember the time in my life when I’d think if my husband really loved me, he’d do this one thing.  Not necessarily something I’d actually verbalized, but a picture in my head that had meaning only to me.  It didn’t occur to me that my husband showed love in other ways and couldn’t figure out what the heck was wrong with me and why didn’t I see that he loved me.  That’s what I thought, and not in a nice way about Courtney, until I saw Courtney with Michael and Morgan. 

Just add diaper bag and wa-la!  Instant Mommy 

It hit me that this young woman is grieving the recent loss of her own baby and facing a bleak conception future.  What better way to instantly assuage her mommy urges than by making the danger to Michael and Morgan so big that she must take them away and assume the parental role vacated by her best friend?  Somewhere deep in her subconscious there’s a movie playing in which she’s the star, the mother of beautiful happy children in a perfect, safe life.  She’s attempting to make it reality.  Do I think the writer’s dig this deep into a character’s motives?  Maybe.  Sometimes.  Does it help me to analyze the characters on a soap?  Yes, I believe it does.  At the very least, it makes me remember maturity points (or lack of) in my own life.

Two against one, Courtney dumps Jason for small town life with

her brother’s kids. 

Courtney may be visualizing happily-ever-after versions of her life as a mother to Michael and Morgan, but Michael wasn’t watching the same movie as he got yanked from school and familiar surroundings.  I’m hoping that he keeps loudly complaining and informing the thickheaded adults around him (that would be Courtney and Sonny) that he wants to go home! 

An Overview of Michael’s Life

My name is Michael and I don’t want to be here.

My Aunt Courtney’s married to Jason.

We hate cops in our family.

Mommy’s in the hospital cause Daddy shot her.

And … 

Any guesses on why a math book was sitting on the table in the house to which Courtney fled?  And when did Courtney have time to bake pie?  I guess she could have bought it when she stopped at Pier One Imports for the candles and placemats she was setting around.  Gotta spend the $10,000 in a backpack somehow.  I’ve said it before and I say again – I must be living wrong because no one ever hands me cash in a bag. 

Sheriff Brian faced off with Jason with their macho feathers aquiver.  I can buy into a lot of plot twists and weird motivations but no way do I believe that Courtney’s so busy with her head in the clouds that she can’t understand when one macho guy meets another macho guy and it ain’t male bonding they’re experiencing.  And for the record Courtney, pie won’t help.

Jason threatens Brian, “Dude, if you look at my wife again I will

turn you to stone with my laser blue eyes.” 

In an interesting, meandering way, through Carly’s dreams she seems to be slowly working her way back to Sonny.  Married to Lorenzo in her coma-fantasies, he’s gradually becoming possessive and unreasonable like Sonny’s been acting for the past few months.  And let’s face facts, in the Fab Four organized crime world allll roads lead to Sonny.  The twists and turns keep me interested because the story could move in any direction once she begins walking and talking.  Carly awoke like Carly lives - one moment asleep and the next eyes wide open. 

It’s kinda cool to see Carly fall for Sonny, again. 

No head tossing, eyes half open for Carly.

One second she’s in a coma and the next second she’s not. 

Sonny told Carly regarding his retirement and their future when she awakes, “We can be like everybody else.”  I love a good funny line! 

And Jason will be taking over Sonny’s territory when?  ‘Cause Faith needs a serious beat down.  She just massacred several men for goodness sakes and I’m expecting a token effort at, or at least a conversation about, consequences.  Meanwhile she’s adopted Zander as her new boy toy.  “That’s right Emmy, you can’t have all the hunky boy toys in town.” which made me smile.  Not that Zander can blame Emily if he winds up in trouble again.  At some point, he has to look at his decisions and take responsibility.  I’m thinkin’ Faith’s in for an unpleasant surprise when Zander doesn’t play well with her.  I can’t picture him in the boy toy role for long.  

He’s mine and I’m keepin’ him!

I am going to take him home and feel (LOL really that was a typo.

I meant FEED him) him and play with him. 

Maybe I should stop making fun of the PCPD’s inability to solve crime.  After all, they obviously do not have metal detectors or other modern equipment at the police department or the courthouse since teenSage strolled in with a gun. 

Red leather and a gun.  Dangerous combo. 

I’ve been writing this column for over a year now and I thought I’d made some great ‘net friends.  But did I hear from anybody last week?  Receive any warning e-mails trying to spare me pain?  No, I did not.  No one sent me a note warning me that ditzy Judge Farmer was showin’ up.  

Judge Farmer and her idiocy aside, Ned, Skye and Alexis were impressive this week.  Alexis continued to fight for her daughter and she’s been fighting so hard for so long (since before Kristina was born) that she doesn’t seem to know how to be Alexis with standards and morals anymore.  She didn’t even thank Ned for his selfless act in relinquishing his parental rights to Kristina.  Aah, you might say, “Ned’s not Kristina’s real father.”  Doesn’t matter when a person creeps into your heart.  Ned, his love obvious for a baby he’s committed to and bonded with, unselfishly gave Kristina up for love and refused to let Alexis off the hook regarding her behavior.  “I hope this turns the cold blooded creature you’ve become into the decent human being that you used to be.”  Skye, also not related to Kristina, blasted Ned with heated emotion as he blindsided her in the courtroom and broke her heart.  Though manipulative Skye was willing to snatch a baby from her mother, there was no doubt that she was motivated by love of Kristina.  Good scenes.

I miss the old Alexis too, Ned.

Ned, you shoulda read the directions that said, “Stir gently.

Do not emotionally ambush or upset Auntie Skye.” 

“Well, it’s about time,” I thought when Skye visited Luke in jail and said, “I’ll help get you out of prison, if you help me destroy the Quartermaine’s.”   Now, we’re getting somewhere. 

Oh yeah!  Luke and Skye scheming means good story

and great dialogue for us! 

So far, the card caper hasn’t drawn me in other than a few individual players.  Luke and Skye, Georgie and Dillon - keep ‘em on my screen and talkin’ and I won’t run to the bathroom during the Deadman’s Hand segments.  Throwing an unscrupulous astronaut into the P.C. mix might be interesting.  Guess we’ll have to wait and see if Chase is a keeper.  I’m thinkin’ Coleman could use a friend and/or partner in crime.

First impression anyone?

Hey Dillon, wanna borrow my hat to hold down your hair? 

Not that I approve of meaningless sex at the drop of a hat but didn’t Emily and Niko look positively princess and princely making love on pillows in front of the fire?  Ending with a fairy tale discussion kind of sealed the ambiance.  And didn’t Liz and Zander look hot?  Liz crawled to edge of the bed and gave Zander that need-a-stud-and-you’re-him look and the two friends scratched the itch of trash-my-life-because-I-hurt. 

Same scene premise, completely different emotions. 

What Liz knows she tells, so don’t expect her to keep a secret.  But to give her credit, when she thought Emily should know that she slept with Zander, Liz called Emily right up and asked to meet with her.  Not with an ugly motivation, but because Emily is her best friend and Liz was worried that her spur of the moment Zander romp might hurt Emily.  I liked her upfront confession and willingness to let the chips fall.

Emily struggles to accept the fact that one studly guy in P.C.

doesn’t worship the ground she walks on. 

Shall we visit the magic place called Spoilerland? 

Brian comes on to Courtney when the lights go out at her house. (GHFF)

Because obviously he’s a mutant psycho sheriff drawn to a mobster’s wife.  If he sticks around, I’m sure we’ll discover that he’s related to Ric, which means in a convoluted way he’d also be related to Sonny.  Oh goody, another Sonny relative who hates him.

Courtney is becoming overly attached to Michael and Morgan. (GHFF)

Told ya so.  The voices in her head sing, “I am Mommy, hear me roar.” 

"Luke is going through horrendous circumstances, he will basically bottom out and get to a place where he is looking for something to live for. Into that breech caroms this woman.... Bob Guza, headwriter, referring to Luke and Skye's
new relationship. (Quote source: SOW) (GHH2)

Correct me if I’m wrong but hasn’t Luke bottomed out at least once a year since Lucky was burned/kidnapped?  Didn’t he bottom out when Laura lost her sanity?  Wasn’t he bottomed out when he made friends with Summer?  How about a change and we see Luke bottoms up and ruling Port Charles?  He and Sonny can become law-abiding citizens and run for joint Mayorship.   

Luke is furious at Scott (Soaptown USA)

LOL.  This one’s a joke, right?  Luke mad at Scotty isn’t a spoiler it’s a tradition. 

On Sunday, I experienced a mortifying moment that came out of the blue.  Usually, on my way into church I hit a few buttons and make my cell phone go silent.  Sitting in church in the middle of the sermon my cell phone began playing its merry tune.  Guess what I forgot to do on my way into church?  Of course, every one around me turned to look and knew exactly what was happening as I fumbled to grab my phone from my purse and press a button, any button, to make it shut up!  Finally, I succeeded in silencing the call and then hit the silence buttons.  Usually stuff happens to me and it makes me laugh but I can tell you that my face was so red I could feel the heat.  After the sermon I sucked it up and walked to the front to apologize to our new pastor who looked at me blankly and said, “That’s OK.  I didn’t even hear it.”  I couldn’t believe it!  There I sat filled with discomfort during the remainder of the sermon, steeling myself to apologize and I didn’t even need to.  Not only that, I told on myself to a relative stranger who doesn’t know anything about my daily foibles so he probably really thinks I’m wacko now.  Oh well, it’ll probably be funny by tomorrow. 

Migrating butterflies steadily have worked their way through my area providing a colorful backdrop to the leaves that are slowly changing color.  Soon I’ll see enormous flocks of birds resting in the fields as they make their way further south.  Sometimes the birds land and they squawk and talk so loudly that I wish I could call the bird police and complain about the noise level.  It’s a sight to behold when thousands upon thousands of birds land in a harvested field like they’re having a wild party.  I hope you can stop and enjoy a moment sometime during your week wherever you live.  Take care.  Thanks for reading. 

Happy Birthday, Carolyn! 

http://www.internetbumperstickers.com

I love screen caps!  Thanks, Terry.

http://groups.msn.com/GHWorld3/shoebox.msnw

Bye, Sage.  Be Safe.  I’ll miss you.