March 22, 2004

Happy, happy Monday and happy Spring!

I'm feeling much more relaxed than I expected to feel today, considering that this is the week, at least by all appearances, that we will find out whether or not we can buy The House (yes, it deserves capital letters).  I still have that feeling of peace that comes from having done all I can do and just needing to wait it out.

I did get a bit of a start when I realized that I had miscounted and our 17 days into escrow where we lose our deposit if we don't get the loan is up on Wednesday, NOT Thursday like I thought.  Talk about yikes!  As with so many other things in my life, it's cutting it down to the line and beyond.

We had a wonderful Spring Equinox.  Even though it was a public ritual, only our group showed up, as well as one other couple that one of our gals knows.  That's never happened before.  We usually get a minimum of 20 or more extra people, sometimes as many as 50.  It's amazing that no one else showed up, but it also gave me a message I was needing.  I told myself that if we had a lot of people show up, we'd commute to Sacramento to do the public rituals this year, but if we didn't, we'd do them at our place.  It looks like it will all be going on in the mountains now!  I'm somewhat relieved by that.  I'm really looking forward to being up there, surrounded by peace and nature.  This is a classic case of the Universe knowing better than I do what I want.  I was totally locked into the idea that I was city girl now and I completely resisted the idea of moving to a remote area whenever Eric brought it up.  I figured it was that young man "Let's go CAMPING" phase.  Now, I can't imagine staying here and can't wait to get up there.  I'm so very excited about the turn my life is taking.

Eric is working a bit today, so I'm on my own with Nathan.  It almost feels like a "normal" day, at least what I remember "normal" to be.  I have some cleaning to do and all of the stuff we needed for the Spring Equinox celebration unloaded from the car when Eric gets back.  Since a lot of our items (tambourine, drums, pheasant wing, etc) we take with us go on our walls as decoration, we have bare walls in the living room and there abouts.  I'm debating whether to even bother putting them back up or if I should just pack them.  I haven't bothered to pack yet or even to start to think about packing.  It seems like it's jinxing the process to do anything before we get the official word.  Having been a military wife for 20+ years, I can pack and move like nobody's business.  It's always nice when "the movers come" and pack up everything, wrapping each little cup individually and putting 3 items in a box with 400 papers.  About half of my moves, if not more, have been me wrapping fragiles in my clothes and transporting stuff in trash bags and laundry baskets.  I've had several good suggestions for boxes, including book stores, McDonalds and movie theaters.  Eric will go out trolling for boxes once we hear the good word.  The kids desperately don't want to go to school on April 2nd because there's a jog-a-thon scheduled and I desperately don't want to pay any more rent on this house.  The sooner the better, as far as I'm concerned.  I think everyone in our family feels the same way.  The only one who is sad is Dylan, who has a million friends at school.  He's such a likable kid and on his report card under "teacher comments" it even says, "Dylan is a great friend."  I know that will help him a lot in the new school, especially coming in on the tail end of a school year, but it's also sad for him to lose the friends he has now.  He's resigned and eager about the good stuff.  Delena is chomping at the bit to leave.  Nathan is oblivious.  It's been explained to him, but he doesn't really fully understand what's going on.  I think he'll be very excited when he sees the enlarged play area.  He's very much an outside play kid and will probably benefit more than anyone.

I am feeling the need to shrine out my house a bit and create a more serene, peaceful environment.  It will also be nice for Eric when he gets home.  David (my son) babysat for me during the Spring Equinox celebration yesterday and while he was here, he cleaned Delena's room (madness, I tell you), the patio area and the boys' room.  It was such a treat to come home and find those things done.  If ever a woman needed a lifetime Merry Maids subscription, it's me.  :)  First, I'd have the Queer Eye guys come in and decimate all that's dear to me, THEN lifetime Merry Maids.  Ahhh.  I can't dream, can't I?

Last check, there were 22 calla lilies blooming and about 18 more in bud form.

Breathing...

Breathing...

Now I have to go put together a gossip column when there is no gossip to be had.  Talk about manifesting...

Love,
K