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I was reading the AJC (Atlanta Journal Constitution) this morning and came across this statement in the “vent” section: “That little brat Michael on "General Hospital" needs to be slung out of a fourth-story window.” Wow! GH is being blasted in the vent??? Now the vent section of the AJC is the place where people send in little snip-its or rants that they want to “vent” with other AJC readers. It got me wondering… Is GH so bad that now we have to send in rants to newspapers? I’ve never seen a soap opera even mentioned in the vent. It is time for Trixie to step in. I’ve decided to write a mini-column this week re-capping my “fantasy” episode of GH. Please keep in mind that in my fantasy episode, any character can be used (it’s my fantasy) whether they are currently on the show or not. Trixie’s Fantasy Land GH Recap. (Cue: harp music) Tiffany Hill blew into town today with her now teenaged son in tow. She headed straight for GH to see her old friends. Seems Tiff needed a heart to heart with Dr. Gail after she overheard a telephone call between Sean and one of the mother’s from her son’s scout pack. Tiffany of course has jumped to the wrong conclusion, due to Seans past infidelity with that hussy Jessica and needed some time apart. Felicia and Mac are all set to tie the knot once again, when we see the camera cut to Frisco arriving at the Port Charles Airport. Anna and Robin are still reeling over the fact that Helena had Robert hidden in the secret chamber under GH. She kept him in a medically induced coma since his accident. He wouldn’t have been discovered if Bobbie and the newly returned Dr. Noah Drake had not been sneaking down to the basement for a little afternoon delight during their break. Jax, Sonny and Jason are still reeling from the fact that Sam is Brenda’s sister. Veronica snuck away from the evil Harlan Barrett when she discovered she was pregnant. She flew to South America where sister Agnes helped her through her pregnancy and delivered a healthy baby girl. Sam was then kidnapped by the man she thought was her father. Seems the slick conman thought baby brokering would be an easy way to make a quick buck. After having Sam for a couple weeks, he discovered how easy it was to con people for money with a cute baby so he kept her and raised her as his own. Speaking of Sonny, it seems the PCPD finally convicted an actual criminal and Sonny is resting comfortably in the big house. He has not been seen on screen for weeks. Jason is still recovering from his automobile accident with Courtney. Jason was riding his motorcycle to the store to get some hair gel and Courtney (PC’s worst driver) ran into him knocking him unconscious. All of his memories of Jason Quartermaine came flooding back to him, and although he is not ready to move back into the mansion, he is actively communicating with Alan and Monica. Jax and Courtney called off their wedding just hours before the ceremony. It seems they decided they looked to much alike to be married so alas, they are just friends. Jax is now currently trying to make his moves on a certain nurse at GH. The one that is known as a gossip. Yep that’s right. Jax has fallen hard for one Amy Vining. AJ is also back in town and it seems he turned the money that he stole into quite a fortune. He arrived in town with a fabulously devious wife and twin daughters. He will complete the hostile takeover of ELQ by Friday. Monica, in an effort to reconnect with her troubled sons, has sent Tracy, Ned & Edward to live in the guest house. She changed the locks and left strict instructions with Reginald, NOT to let them back in. Georgia and Dillon are shacking up across town and couldn’t be happier. Sage was filming a music video in the swamp and while walking to her dressing room, made a wrong turn, fell into some quicksand and will never be seen again. Lois and Alcazar continue to be the “hot” couple. Carly is still chasing after him, but she has her hands full with Michael and Morgan. Seems little Michael got to big for his boots and was sent to military school. Morgan Corinthos now 14 is openly gay and trying out for the Port Charles ballet. Carly runs the Cellar full time and doesn’t get much screen time L. Well that’s all for this weeks episode of GH Fantasy Land……
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