Pick Me! Pick Me!

January 12, 2004

I think I’m going to GNC today to buy some melatonin. I was up again last night (this morning, actually) at 3:30 AM. I’m not sure why this keeps happening but it’s really gettin’ old! This time I woke up at the really good part of a dream about Ted King. Now that was frustrating! Now I don’t typically dream about Ted King. Usually I dream about my high school boyfriend and then half way through the dream I realize I’m married to Jack and I wake up. Today I dreamed that Ted King was explaining to me his desire to have kids and that he was experiencing difficulty with it. I offered to help him and then I woke up! What a bummer! I’m sure I could have found a creative way to help the poor guy!

I stayed awake because my mind started racing. The View on ABC is having a contest “The View Breakfast with a Soap Star Contest” and the GH soap star is none other than Ted King. I’ve been contemplating submitting an essay about why I should be the one picked and that kept me up.

If you remember, last August I was considering asking him if his private part really did look bigger when he shaved, based on his guest appearance on Sex and the City. I rushed to the front of his line but I wasn’t sure I’d have the guts to go through with it. I did it and I was more than pleased with his response and look of surprise! Katrina and Kathy were cracking up and I’m just thankful I was the first of about 400 other women to mention that to him that day!

Do I want to be a soap star stalker? No, not really. Do I want to have a chance to sit in front of the guy and potentially get egg on my face (literally and figuratively speaking!)? OF COURSE! But I cannot, for the life of me think of what to write for this essay. Likely this is the first time I’m experiencing writers block! Besides, it’s a maximum of fifty words. FIFTY words! With the end of that sentence I’m already at 368 words! There is no way I can say all I’d need to say to sound convincing in a mere fifty words! What, haven’t these judges ever heard of adjectives? Come on!

But being the obsessive type that I am, I realize I will likely not sleep until I do. So I’m working on it. But I need your help! Below is the information regarding the contest and the rules to win. If any of you wonderful and faithful EOS readers aren’t going to submit something for yourselves, pick me! Pick me! You can nominate me to win breakfast with Ted King! I know each and every single one of you can write fifty little words about why Carolyn Aspenson from Eye On Soaps should stuff her face in front of the gorgeous and highly underused Ted King of General Hospital. Please. I’m worried I may never sleep again!

If I do win, I’ll also be on The View (which pales in comparison to eating with Ted King in my opinion). On the show I’ll detail my breakfast. I’m sure will go something like this:

Ted: “So Carolyn, tell me about yourself.”

Me: “Uh, um. Does it really look bigger when you shave? Tee hee!”

Ted: “Excuse me?”

Me: “Oh, sorry. I already asked you that. Last year when I rushed up to your table at the fan luncheon. Don’t worry. I’m...I’m...not a stalker. Honest.”

Ted: “Oh, yeah, I remember you. You’re the one in the black dress with the fat arms.”

And then I’ll throw my eggs at him!

I’ve received many emails from all of you saying you like what I write and can relate to my feelings. So here I am, appealing to your kinder side; asking you to relate to my feelings now and spare fifteen minutes to write a measly fifty word essay about why Carolyn Aspenson (that’s A S P E N S O N)  from www.eyeonsoaps.com should eat with Ted.

If you decide you want to, shoot me an email and we can discuss our individual contact information to put in the letter! Thanks for helping me, the Ted King Charity Case!

Here’s the information:

Enter Carolyn Aspenson to win The View Breakfast with a Soap Star Contest, sponsored by Denny's!

Before your breakfast, get pampered at the spa with View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Then have breakfast in your posh New York City hotel suite with the ABC Daytime heartthrob of your choice. And before you leave New York City, visit The View and be the envy of all your friends as your dream breakfast is shared with America!

Three lucky winners will receive:

· Roundtrip Airfare for (2) to New York City

· (2) nights hotel accommodations

· Breakfast with one of three ABC Daytime heartthrobs, pictured above · Spa treatments with View Co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck

· (2) Tickets to attend The View, as this dream breakfast is shared with America

To enter the contest, nominate a deserving friend, or yourself, by sending The View an essay of 50 words or less, that tells us why the nominee deserves this once in a lifetime experience. Include the name, mailing address, daytime and evening telephone number and a photo of the nominee and yourself, and indicate the nominee's Soap Star of choice, from the following options:

· Cameron Mathison, "Ryan Lavery", All My Children

· Kamar de los Reyes, "Antonio Vega", One Life To Live

· Ted King, "Lorenzo Alcazar", General Hospital

Here's what to write:

"The fans of Eye on Soaps nominate Carolyn Aspenson from www.eyeonsoaps.com for her bravery in asking Ted King at the 2003 GH Fan Luncheon if his script from Sex and the City is true: If his penis really does look bigger when he shaves . Her bravery is respected by all of us!"

Here's where to mail your entry:

"Breakfast with a Soap Star Contest"
P.O. Box 470928
Celebration, Florida, 34747
All entries must be received by 12:00pm EST on Friday, January 23, 2004.

I await the phone call.