What if We'd Always Joined Names Together?
If we soap fans had always been in the habit of
joining the names of couples, what would we have had? And do any of these
actually sound more silly than what we have now (Brazen, Brax, Journey,
Liason, CourAJ, Nexis, etc,...)? Luke & Laura = Laurka...LauLu...LuLau...Luau? Frisco & Felicia = Felisco...Frilicia...Felco...Ferisc? Mac & Felicia = McFlee...FelMac...MacFel...Mel...Fac? Blackie & Lou = Blue...Lack...Blouck..Loukie? Bobbie & Tony = Bony...Tobbie...ToeBob...BobTone? Brenda & Jagger = Bagger...Jenda...Bragger..Jender? Heather & Scotty = Hottie...Scother...Sceath...HeaScot? Mac & Dominique = Mom...Dac...MacNique...NiqueMa? Sean & Tiffany = Shiff...Chiffon...Tiffean...SeanTif? Robert & Anna = Ranna...RoAnn...AnnRob...AnnErt? Stefan & Laura = LaurFan...StefLaur...LaStef...LaurAn? And we could go on and on. Please! STOP THE MADNESS!!!! We, as soap fans, are like, major trendsetters. We can not let the disease of Name Blending reach into other areas of the media and thus, our lives, and the lives of our loved ones! Can you imagine the chaos???? On "Cheers," Sam and Diane would have been "Sian." On "Friends," Chandler and Monica would be "Mondler." On "I Love Lucy," Lucy and Ricky would have been "Licky" or "Rucy." "Dharma & Greg" would have been "Dreg." Kermit and Miss Piggy would be "Kiggy" or "Kergy." Scarlett and Rhett would have been "Scett" or "Rhar." Laura and George Bush would be "Lorge." We just CANNOT let this happen! STOP THE MADNESS!!!!!! Aargh!!! The Humanity! The Humanity!!!! As God Is My Witness, (clenching fist and waving it at the sky), I will never Nendgin (name blend again)!!! |
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What if We'd Always Blended Names?