Dishin the soaps with the Eye on Soaps Co-webmaster

December 20, 2002

Oh, I am JUST a happy girl! There are things going on with each soap that I really enjoy, as well as some that I donít, and overall, Iím pleased as punch.

I, as you can probably imagine for those who know me, was thrilled with the montage of counselors trying to help Adam and Liza.  Having their relationship summarized into a nutshell the size of a baseball was hilarious and really served to distill down the incredible dysfunction in their family to a delicious stew.  I loved how the continually talked over one another and stymied one professional after another.  It really goes to show how important that one element of soap addiction really is:  watching to assure us of how ďnormalĒ our life is in comparison.  As soon as the last counselor walked in, we knew she was a go.  Oh, how Iíd love to hang out with her for a few hours.  Even living in California, I just donít run into enough truly eccentric people for my taste.   

I also enjoyed the engagement between Liza and Brooke at the jail.  If nothing else, Brooke has inevitably shown extreme courage and going to visit Liza to apologize was no exception.  Sadly, the one time she did say screw it and took the low road (since Iíve been watching, anyway), it ended up destroying her world.  She began to lose my interest back when she was basically blackmailing Leo to stay with her evil daughter, Laura.  She took his chivalrous and unselfish deed of marrying a dying woman and turned it into a lifelong sentence with the benefit of a giant bank account.  By the time we got to the fiasco of a wedding where the sprinklers heralded the douching out of a fairly putrid stench of overkill, I was chuckling like an old hen clucking.  It was a joy to see Evil Laura get hers and I would have personally poured her into a straight jacket and hauled her to the loony bin at that point.  I do think Greenlee let him back in just a little too easily, especially after the way he treated her when he was married to Laura, but who could resist Leo if he smiled?  Not me! 

I also really, really like the humanizing of David that Leoís death and his babyís upcoming birth have brought.  Iíve worked with a lot of doctors, both as a labor coach and childbirth instructor, as well as front office and medical transcribing and I can tell you that the God complex he favors isnít all that rare.  Itís amazing what these folks can cultivate in their own minds when the power to save a life is learned.  Iíve met some wonderful docs who actually were humble in the face of things like the will to live and the power of prayer, but many are not too far off of the David Hayward school of thought.  There just couldnít be much better than seeing one of my favorite actress, the sorely underused Ellen Bethea (Rachel Gannon) of One Life to Live fame, take him down a peg or two.  I can imagine if weíd told one of our GYN docs to go scrub the speculums!  Community service definitely makes the humble lights in your crown glow a bit brighter.  If only Bethea could get a contract!  Iíd gladly trade all of the Jamieís and JRís and their little girlfriends too for one Ellen Bethea!!  In fact, I think we should bring her on for Colbyís sake (wink to my gal pal, Kate). 

Davidís connection with Greenlee has been particularly moving and the scene yesterday where she opened the door and just wrapped herself around him brought me to tears.  It was stunning to me when she remarked to Kendall that she was a widow because I hadnít thought of it as such until then.  I wonder how long it will be until the psychic who touched Leoís jacket will be vindicated with a handsome, strapping Leo swaggering back into the Valley?  We know itís only a matter of (way too much) time.  Suffice it to say that if I could get Leo and Ryan back, thatíd be all Katrina wanted for Christmas!  Leo, Ryan and Chris on one screen is heaven for me! 

Anna has definitely done an about face and I really believed her when she said she was just too weary to fight any more.  She came onto the show when?  Last year!  Wow.  What a lot for a person to go through in that amount of time!  Regaining her memory, re-meeting her brother-in-law and daughter, not to mention her long lost twin sister.  Then we had the forgettable Gabrielle, a brother now never mentioned.  Pity she never got to meet the real Dimitri!  Rrroowwlll.  A nephew who is suddenly the hub of Pine Valley.  Incurring the ire, then respect, then favoring of Chris Stamp.  Being appointed Police Chief (bought and paid for) and then resigning as Police Chief and then taking a leave of absence as Police Chief and then returning as Police Chief.  Having a heated affair with David, then marrying David out of convenience, then falling in love with David, then getting pregnant, then leaving David, then nearly divorcing David, then getting back together with David.  Add to that, having her buddy, Bart, killed off.  Itís been a big year for the Chief!  All in a yearís soap work, I guess. 

Having Palmer eek out of hiding long enough to engage in a few scenes with Kendall has been a real treat for me.  Since I only started watching a year or so ago, I had not seen much of him (and I really regret missing his relationships with Vanessa and Opal!), so getting to know him has been a joy.  He is just my kind of man!  Before this most recent marriage, it was that stable, self-assured, successful, centered older man (rich works too!) type to which I was extremely attracted.  Of course, Sweetie Petey would have to be shipped off to boarding school faster than you can say ďpain in my assĒ and someone would have to give Opal a good dose of X-whatever to erase her memory and get her out of my way, but other than that, Iíd make Palmer a REALLY happy guy. 

Kendall and Greenleeís alliance has proven to be every bit as delicious as I had anticipated and the bringing in of Simone is even more flavorful.  What a brilliant idea to bring together possibly the three most diverse young woman personalities on the canvas to a common cause!  Of course, AMC does this quite well with the long-term friendship of Erica and Opal, and from what Karen and Kate tell me, friendships have always held a strong hand on AMC, a lesson GH could really stand to learn.  I look forward to the unfolding of this story (The Little Perfume That Could) that is finally playing out. 

Could anything possibly be more annoying than this mess of Maria and Maureen and Aiden and Edmund?  It started out with promise, but it now stinks to high heaven and whenever anyone gets near it, they stink as well.  Edmund seems ill equipped to come off as anything other than a totally boring, boorish ass since the moment Maria reappeared.  Aiden is hot when heís lying on his back with his mouth closed or kissing up a storm (were those kisses with Maureen hot or what??), but as soon as that bad accent kicks in, he sounds like the rather dumb blokes whose asses I used to kick at 501 darts in exchange for a pub drink and a cigarette.  He does look good in barkeep gear, but start talking and his value drops like pigeon shit from the air. 

I pushed her out the window.  I tried to turn her aroundÖreally hard.  I tripped on my fugly dress and fell into her.  I thought really hard and she just flew out the window.  First of all, I wasnít even in the room. Pick your story and stick to it, Liza.  People are getting antsy wondering why Jake is being such an ass?  Does anyone remember when he used to be called ďJakeass?Ē  His fiancťe was booted out of a mansionís attic window under freaky circumstances, Liza mopes around for days with a guilty conscience and then they hear her confess?  Iíd say his reaction is right on the money.  Iíd have her ass arrested too until we figured out what went on.   

Frank is a hottie, but like Aiden, as soon as he opens his word hole and lets flow the rhetoric, his street value plummets.  Iíll trade him for his daddy any day.  His temper tantrum about his baby just illustrated why Mia kept her pregnancy a secret in the first place, not to mention his little speech about bringing children into "this world."  Pfft.

I canít believe that Simone STILL has to pay for sleeping with Roger!  I didnít see anything she did wrong back then (So WHAT if she wants to keep the identity of the person sheís sleeping with as her business instead of broadcasting it as public knowledge!  Isnít that a ladyís prerogative?) and Iím still confused about why Greenlee is still taking such a hard angle on this.  Iím also disappointed that the obvious relationship between Mary and Jackson was not explored and that the whole issue of Greenlee potentially not being Rogerís child was dropped like hot potato.  Donít get me started on Proteus. 

So what are we naming the Baby Devane-Hayward now that Leo is likely out of the running for a female name?  Leonore?  Iím sure this may have been mentioned in a moment I missed (although the ďmini meĒ moment of revealing the gender of the baby was just cute as all get out), but that L looks engraved on the cradle in a fairly indelible fashion.  Shall we presume Baby L D-H makes her entrance for February sweeps (Puh-lease can we have some baby, any baby come to term on ABC??  Iím sadly deficient on the humorous labor and delivery story front).   

Hope everyone has a lovely holiday!  OLTL and GH columns will follow in the next few days! 



E-mail Katrina


December 4, 2002

The One About Soap Couple Names

The One About Soap People
Who Look Like Real People

The One About Why Soaps Don't 
Go The Way We Want Them To

The One About Jason and Liz
July 2002

Katrina's Soap Journal
June 2002

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April-May 2002

Katrina's Soap Journal
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February 2002

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December 2001

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December 1-22, 2000

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