Katrina's Nonsoapy Journal

March 28, 2003

Getting ready for what I hope will be a great weekend.  Nothing is planned at all.  That's part of what's great about it.  Delena has an earache, on Day #2.  She's down with chamomile, warm glycerin drops and Tylenol.  She has a really special scout event she wants to go to tonight, so that gives her some incentive. 

Today is picture day and I'm sorry Delena missed that.  There is always a make-up day, so maybe she can catch it then.  Dylan looked very sweet and handsome for the event. 

No, I'm not a Betty Boop fan.  Like the Three Stooges, Boop just gets on my nerves, but I couldn't resist the cool moon pic.

Today is superclean day so that I *can* kick back on the weekend.  David (my son) is coming to visit today.  The kids are completely enraptured by David's superior video game skills and they fester for his visits.  That makes the weekend better from the start. 

For now, I'll leave you with a few funnies that my buddy, Sage, passed on to me and wish you a wonderful, blessedly calm and peaceful Spring weekend.

Forty Warning Signs of Insanity

1. Your friends tell you that you have been acting strange lately, and then you hit them several times with a sledgehammer.

2. Everyone you meet appears to have tentacles growing out of places that you wouldn't expect tentacles to be growing from.

3. You start out each morning with a 30-minute jog around the bathroom. 

4. You write to your mother in Germany every week, even though she sends you mail from Iowa asking why you never write.

5. Every time you see a street sign, you have a tremendous urge to relieve yourself on it.

6. You wear your boxers on your head because you heard it will ward of evil dandruff spirits.

7. You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for setting fire to his lawn decorations.

8. Every commercial you hear on the radio reminds you of death.

9. People stay away from you whenever they hear you howl.

10. Your breath smells more and more like squirrel dung each passing day.

11. You laugh out loud during funerals.

12. When your doctor tells you to say ah, you yell out "RAPE! RAPE!"

13. Nobody listens to you anymore, because they can't understand you through that scuba mask.

14. You begin to stop and consider all of the blades of grass you've stepped on as a child, and worry that their ancestors are going to one day seek revenge.

15. You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.

16. Your father pretends you don't exist, just to play along with your little illusion.

17. You collect dead windowsill flies.

18. Everytime the phone rings, you shout, "Hey! An angel just got its wings!"

19. You like cats. Especially with mayo.

20. You scream "I've got a knife!" to people who try to sell you things.

21. You scream "I've got a knife!" to people at your family reunion.

22. You cry at the end of every episode of Gilligan's Island, because they weren't rescued.

23. You put tennis balls in the microwave to see if they'll hatch.

24. Whenever you listen to the radio, the music sounds backwards.

25. You have a predominant fear of fabric softener.

26. You wake up each morning and find yourself sitting on your head in the middle of your front lawn.

27. Your dentist asks you why each individual tooth has your name etched on it, and you tell him it's for security reasons.

28. Melba toast excites you.

29. When the waiter asks for your order, you ask to go into another room to tell him, because "the napkins have ears."

30. You tend to agree with everything your mother's dead uncle tells you.

31. Every time you see the commercial for the Hair Club For Men, you think to yourself, "I think I'll kill the pope today."

32. You call up random people and ask if you can borrow their dog, just for a few minutes.

33. Your main goal in life is to become the president of Bulimia.

34. Nearly everything you say involves the word, "P-toing!"

35. You argue with yourself about which is better, to be eaten by a koala or to be loved by an infectious disease.

36. You like to sit in cornfields for prolonged periods of time, and pretend that you're a stalk.

37. You think that exploding wouldn't be so bad, once you got used to it.

38. You try to make a list of the Warning Signs of Insanity. (cough)

39. People offer you help, but you unfortunately interpret this as a violation of your rights as a boysenberry.

40. You like reading lists like this. :)

Good God, She's Verbose!  There's More!

    Mar 27, 2003 Mar 26, 2003
Mar 25, 2003 Mar 20, 2003 Mar 18, 2003 Mar 17, 2003
Mar 10, 2003 Mar 6, 2003 Mar 5, 2003 Mar 4, 2003
Feb 27, 2003 Feb 26, 2003 Feb 25, 2003 Feb 24, 2003
Feb 22, 2003 Feb 21, 2003 Feb 20, 2003 Feb 13, 2003
Feb 12, 2003 Feb 4, 2003 Jan 24-29, 2003 Jan 23, 2003
Jan 22, 2003 Jan 17, 2003

Jan 13, 2003

Jan 9, 2002

Jan 3, 2002

Dec 24-25, 2002

Dec 13-18, 2002

Dec 12, 2002

Dec 11, 2002 Dec 10, 2002 Dec 5, 2002 Dec 1, 2002
thru Nov 29, 2002 thru Nov 22, 2002 thru Nov 18, 2002 Nov 8, 2002
Oct 23, 2002 Oct 9, 2002 Oct 4-8. 2002 Oct 2, 2002
Last of Sept 2002 More Sept 2002 Aug - Sept 2002 August 2002
July 2002 June 2002 April - May 2002 Mar 2002
Feb 2002 Jan 2002 Dec 2001 Nov 2001



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