The weekend seemed to go on forever, which normally would
be a good thing, but this time it was like a dream where you're running through
mud in slow motion and never getting anywhere. Eric is wound up tighter
than a 8 day clock, waiting to hear something on the financing for his company.
He's three weeks into the layoff and funds are incredibly short. The
tension left him really difficult to be around and communicate with in any way.
My headache is back and has traveled down into my back and shoulders, so I'm
expecting that will let up when the damn breaks and this gets underway. I
need for him to get some good news and get on his way with work. I'm not
eager to go through the mess we survived last year, but if we have to, we have
to. Poverty is not anything new to me. It's not a good friend, but
it's an old friend and one we know how to manage.
We did a lot of visualization and imagery to try and
diffuse the frustration he was feeling and keep him focused on the goal rather
than the temporary inconvenience; lots of seeing the goal as a done deal rather
than focusing on the process to get there. He's out now with his partner,
Dan, looking around for financing.
My friend, KRISTEN, got me addicted to this horrible,
horrible game. Noooo, it's not the Retail Alphabet game, (http://www.joeykatzen.com/alpha/).
That one I mastered with a little help from Sage. Noooo, it's not that
horrible neopets game where you have to get them all to McDonalds (http://www.neopets.com/games/launch_game.phtml?r=8257244&game_id=252&rand_num=&quality=High).
That one I also bested, again, with a little help from Sage and his Darlings.
This one is even more insidious than any game, ever before.
http://www.eonline.com/On/AnnaNicole2/Game/Flash/agame.html
It's the Anna Nicole game.
In this game, you move squares around that have pictures
of the things Anna Nicole loves (Texas, Sugarpie, Howard, Kimmy, pickles,
diamonds and pizza). You can only move tiles from side to side and up and
down. You can only move a tile if it connects up to two of the same tile,
again, vertically or horizontally. You are timed while you do this.
Turn off the sound. Trust me. There are certain tiles that pop in
from time to time that flash up a sequence of all of the tile pictures.
You click on that tile and whichever picture you hit takes out all of the tiles
on the board with that same pictures. If you get to the point where there
are no matches on the table, it will shoot you a new set automatically. I
have never gotten beyond level 9. If you lose a level, you can't re-enter
on that level with a code or anything. You have to replay everything from
level 1 again.
The bitter irony of this game is that I know in my heart
that Anna Nicole could not get past level 1-2. I try hard not to judge
people harshly, but (Dr Phil says the "but" in a sentence means "ignore what I
just said; now I'm going to tell you what I really thing) damn, that girl has
some serious issues.
I heard about the "Anna Nicole" show right after it first
came on the air and I was absolutely mortified. It was obvious from the
press that the country was very much laughing AT her and not WITH her and I
wondered how the people who advise her could let her go through with such a
thing. Didn't they know that she was being exploited by E! ?
Didn't they care enough about her to veer her away from it?
One night, I was on the phone while watching E True
Hollywood Story (I LOVE biography shoes) and I missed the end, taking it on into
Anna Nicole. After I got off the phone, I was mesmerized. It was
like watching a train wreck. It was that show that made me realize what a
prude I am and how glad I am to be one. I have watched a few
episodes since then, just because it's so mesmerizing. I definitely don't
feel sorry for her at all any more. Whatever ridicule she gets honestly
couldn't happen to a nicer person. She's is continually abusive to the
people around her, who for whatever reason worship the ground she walks on.
She demeans, rants, calls names, pouts and freaks out over the most minor
things, such as when Howard, her lawyer, accused her of cheating on a "how much
can you eat" contest when she went to the bathroom to vomit. It was
obvious what she was doing and when he called her on it, she treated him like
crap for the rest of the episode. What a nutcase.
The girl with the blue/purple hair is Kimmy, her personal
assistant who is smitten to the bone and gives Anna puppydog eyes and longing
looks in every episode I've seen. The tattoo you see on her arm is one she
got of Anna herself. Evidently, Anna has cajoled several people, including
members of her family, into getting tattoos of her on their bodies. In the
pictures to the right, that's Anna, Howard and Kimmy at Magic Mountain.
Kimmy hates roller coasters and begged all the way there not to go, begged not
to go on any while there, was brutally bullied by Anna to go on several while
there, cried all the way through it and on the way home. Sure it's Anna's
fault for being such a self-involved, manipulative bitch, but it's Kimmy's fault
for not having the backbone to say, "You know what, screw you. I deserve
better than this."
When I see Howard taking her abuse (Howard Stern, by the
way, just not THAT Howard Stern), it seems more like it's bought and paid for,
so she must have him on one hell of a retainer. He actually seems fairly
normal and sane rather than an obedient disciple/minion like Kimmy.
I do watch the show time and again, for nothing more than
to remind myself that there are people out there like Anna Nicole, who live in a
freaky, narcissistic world build of their own excesses and self-indulgence.
It's scary, but sometimes, you need to know.
Meanwhile, this game is kicking my ass.
We had Dylan's fake birthday party on Saturday and it went
well. I forgot the camera, which is a bummer. I would have liked a
picture of the Ninja Turtle cake that came out really well. He had 6
kiddies show up and they had a lot of fun. Word to the wise: NO
piņata. Just trust me. Six-year-olds + blindfold + big stick =
very bad. I was able to stick to a decent shoestring and the kids seemed
to have a good time. We'll have his family party next month on his real
birthday (July 5th).
On Friday, my new little dog ran away. We're not
sure when she got out. I had her in my arms when I told Delena goodbye
that morning, then she ran to the back of the house. Around lunchtime, I
realized I hadn't see her for a while. She was a big sleeper, so I though
she was probably curled up on someone's blanket somewhere. I went looking
for her and couldn't find her. No idea when or how she left, but she's
gone. I'm a little sad, but I'm happy for the time she was here and I hope
she is safe and happy where ever she is.
With that, it's time to JUST DO IT again and clean things
up around here. The "Pfft, just get the damned stuff done" approach seems
to be working. No way through but through until I can afford Merry Maids.
I don't like it or even tolerate it any more than ever, but at least it's done.
Homework for today: Evaluate everyone in your immediate vicinity that you
well and truly love, then decide one thing you can do to make their day better
and make certain that they know that you love them.
Talk to you later!
Love,
