June 11, 2003

I have returned!  I can't believe how nutty the past few days have been!  Eric and his partners have been exhausting every resource to find financing for their company and it's been rocky.  They had a wonderful investment source, but she isn't returning calls now and they've pretty much given up on that.  There is enough working money to go on for now, but extras aren't going to happen for a little while now.

As if that wasn't enough, it's going to cost more for the web hosting on the site this month and the timing on it really sucks.  I still firmly believe it will all work out.  The calla lilies had stopped blooming for the summer and now there are two blooms popping up an odd angle in the huge bunch, so I'm betting the miracle is going to come from a very unexpected source.  Pfft.  I don't care where it comes from as long as it comes.  I'm still totally trusting "the process" and just going with it.  Our needs are met for today and I've learned enough to know that the difference between today and tomorrow, for good or bad, can be profound, so it will be what it is to be.

v

I can't believe there are only 2 more days of school left after today!!  The kids both did extremely well this year and we're all eager for Summer.  Nathan has started sleeping in until about 7:30, so it will be a joy for me to get that extra hour of sleep every day.  He's been so mellow today I'm afraid to even speak it aloud.  The only thing he's done that was even remotely questionable was fill the toothbrush hold with water when he was brushing his teeth.  It's mercifully quiet around here.  Kiddies will be home in less than an hour and the quiet will be fractured.  :)

I've really been missing my little puppy dog.  Who would think that a little four-legged critter could get under your skin so quickly?  I guess she was just a little nomad baby.  We had one of those when I was a young teen at home.  A beautiful, well-trained German shepherd showed up at our house.  He could catch frisbees and loved to play ball.  We called him Pharaoh because he was just so regal looking (very Rin Tin Tin).  He stayed for about a month and then was just gone one morning.  Nathan noticed Roxy was gone this morning and wanted to know what happened to the "baby dog."  He was sad when I had to tell him she ran away.  It's been since Friday and I've pretty much given up on the idea of her coming back.  She was very sweet to cuddle and love while she was here, so I'm just grateful for the time we had with her.

This Saturday is Full Moon and it seems like years since the last one.  Meeting with my coven sisters and falling into the comfort of that family relationship is going to be like a balm after the past two weeks.  It's one of the few places in my life where there is never any conflict, never any drama, never any big issues.  We've been together for many years now, through lots of changes and life lessons.  It's so great to be around that kind of unconditional love and support.  I think the closest we ever came to anything heavy as far as bumps in the road was this year when our group was going through some changes when people were being led in different directions all at once.  More than anything, it was just disorienting because we'd all been together for so long.  One of our folks relocated to Colorado, another had to leave for personal reason and another left and now has returned (for which we are very grateful!).  Another left, called to a different path of practice.  It was dizzying, to say the least and a very, very busy year.  Every meeting, I wonder what is next on the horizon.  The moons work so well to delineate the month for me and keep me in tune with the cycles of nature.

There are a LOT of  sirens outside right now, which always makes me nervous.  It's still 15 minutes until my kids start walking home, so I don't have to worry about the whole mischief on the way home thing, so I'm limited to the Columbine/fire/crazy people issue.  I know that worry is a really senseless and purposeless action, but my heart just kind of goes there even when my head knows it's not realistic or wise.  When you have 6 kids, there are 6 different directions for anything in the world to go wrong.  I worry about them all.  I have to do it in bits and pieces or I'll go mad. (mad, I tell you)

Sage says he may come up on Sunday, which will be nice (unless he and Eric spend another 2 hours discussing the Koran (Quran, whichever).  Zzzzzzzz.  Eric takes lessons in Arabic at one of our local mosques (he is self taught and putting finishing touches on his progress so he can speak it as well as he can read it) so he can read the Koran in the actual language in which it was written.  Both Eric and Sage have an insatiable interest in world religions and when the two of them get going, no one else is in the room.  In a way, I can't imagine investing that much passion into anything, but here I am, spending hours a day on a website, so I guess in a way I can. 

The kids will be home soon and I'm feeling the need to blow some pennies on Dairy Queen ice cream.  That should give them a lift.  After that, there is the Big Rock Laundry Mountain calling my name.  If I could hire someone to keep my laundry done up and my house scrubbed, life would be total bliss.   In absence of that, I should likely get busy.

:)

Love,
Katrina

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